bimbo maybe, but heart for sure

I really feel that Pam Anderson deserves a lot more love than she gets. Obviously, she’s an easy target for jokes about (insert anything crude here), but the girl is actually a pretty awesome world citizen. Her support for PETA is well known – she’s been promoting their cause since before an environmental affiliation was pretty much mandatory for celebrities du jour. And she’s a Canadian export…

Some may say Pam is past her prime, but I’ve never seen her look sexier than riding a bike through traffic. (It’d be sexier if she wore a helmet!)

killing modern Darwinism

So CBC served me up something nice to rant about today; transsexuals in sports. Specifically, a woman (who was born a man) wanting to compete in this year’s Olympics in women’s cycling.

In this case – about Kristen (formerly known as Chris) Worley – the gender issue is completely irrelevant. She’s saying that she deserves to be in the Olympics because she can meet the qualifying time. But she’s never competed in a qualifying event! “I can run 100m in 10 seconds flat. No, I’ve never raced, but just trust me. Take away the position of some other chick who has been training and racing her entire life, earned her position on the Olympic team through sanctioned qualifying events, and give it to me!” Honestly, I don’t know where this Kristen gets her sense of entitlement… So forget the argument about discrimination and breaking down barriers; try out or quit whining.

This situation will undoubtedly come up again, though, and I’ll be very interested to see what decisions are made. Kristen is arguing that there is no physical advantage for transitioned females. I think that’s bullshit, and any woman who lines up at the starting line next to a woman who has spent the first 25 years of her life in a man’s body building man muscles is going to think that’s bullshit too.

Anti-discrimination used to be “Treat all people equally”. Now, it’s “Treat all people equally, and some people more equally than others.” For real, that’s what I learned in HR. Am I the only person who thinks that, to an extent, society is too accommodating for personal differences?

“Years of oppression and a lack of opportunities”… blah blah blah. How about an elderly woman driving through a bus shelter and killing someone because taking away her license would be ageism? How about an autistic child being disruptive and violent to other students in a classroom because excluding him from the public school system would be unfair?

If you cut off your manmeat, you give up the opportunity to compete at the Olympics. You also give up the ability to pee standing up. Sacrifices come with all decisions, and I would hope that Kristen properly weighed the pros and cons before making this life-altering choice.

People need to focus on what they can do within their limitations. We’d all be a lot happier and a lot more productive if we’d develop our personal strengths, focus on our advantages instead of disadvantages, instead of wanting the world to roll over and change everything for us.

I'm taking my trash to Clive Doucet's house

In a display of extreme backward thinking, Clive Doucet, the city councilor for the Glebe, has indicated that he will not allow recycling bins on Bank Street because “they take up so much room on the pavement”.

Are you for real?! How did this guy - who seems to be the ONLY person who did not get the international memos about global warming, environmental crisis, overflowing landfills and the need for better waste management and reduction – get elected and get the authority to make this decision? I would hope the residents of the Glebe would jump all over this and indicate to their representative that they are willing to share their sidewalk space with recycling bins.

Is it not grotesquely unfashionable for politicians to express these anti-environmentalist sentiments nowadays?

hockey & fashion are a natural fit...?

Sean Avery, professional hockey player/jackass, got an internship with Vogue! VOGUE! Are you KIDDING me?! I can't decide if I'm more angry, jealous or just confused. I suppose Anna Wintour wasn't aware of his on-ice antics, because they surely would not transfer well - I can just picture him stabbing someone with a 6 inch stilletto, uttering racial slurs at Naomi Campbell... Or maybe she sees in him the opportunity to bring high-fashion to the Canadian hockey fan...? Well the plaid on the Jean Paul Gautier runway isn't quite like the plaid on Don Cherry's blazers, and I can't picture the men in Saskatchewan switching in their double-denim Canadian "tuxedos" for Dolco & Gabbana.

A google photo search did suggest the guy's got a decent fashion sense, but it's hard to look bad when you've got arm candy like Elisha Cuthbert. I've got to assume that this is his way to access more ridiculously good looking women that are by all appearances way out of his league.

By the way, anyone remember the Take That video "Back for Good"? Where Robbie Williams is dancing in the rain, with his fur ear-flap hat and trenchcoat? I really feel that Avery was channeling that particular 1990s boy-band style for this look...

I periodically like to flatter myself by thinking that I'm intelligent enough to blog about things more important than celebrity gossip. But I find that news stories today fall into one of three categories; 1) things that are too depressing to blog about, 2) things that are way over my head, or 3) celebrity gossip, classified as "entertainment news". As one of my primary interests is making fun of people, I usually end up putting way too much energy towards the third category.

However, there were a few news pieces today with promising environmental news - something that gives me more feel-good vibes than the "celebrity don'ts" sections:

1) From the environmental armageddon that is the USA, CNN is reporting a record decline in driving. Americans drove 11 billion fewer miles in March 2008 than they did in March 2007. This probably has a lot more to do with gas prices than environmental concern, but positive results regardless.

2) The LCBO is going to stop providing plastic bags to customers. Before you whine about it and tell me the plastic bags are recylable, let me provide you with an overload of information that only an idiot would argue against (Chris, go ahead):

• The LCBO is still going to provide paper bags and cardboard boxes, so you can still be a boozehound and buy more than you can carry in your two hands.
• The manufacturing of plastic bags uses 4% of our oil supply - oh, are we short on that non-renewable natural resource?!
• Only 1-3% of plastic bags are actually recycled (putting recyclable items in recycling containers seems to be unfathomably difficult for some people)
• Beer comes in boxes with handles.
• If you used those plastic bags to pick up doggie poop, Home Depot now supplies biodegradable bags for that.

CBC has a pretty interesting and informative "in depth" look at plastic bags that you can check out if you're still cynical. Also, one of my comments got featured in the LCBO article, so I'm feeling pretty special about that!

when you run out of male low-lifes to date...

Now that Lindsay Lohan is engaged to DJ Samantha Ronson, hopefully the world can put an end some of those ridiculous rumours. Do I mean those rumours that Lindsay Lohan is a whore? Oh no no, not those rumours – I have no doubt that those stand true. I mean the rumours that hot lesbian couples exist. They don’t. And if you boys are getting all hot and bothered by this latest celebrity coupling news, please see the inserted photo as evidence.

Please note that I love Ellen and Portia. They both have abundances of charm and I think they’re fantastic. But I don’t think there are pictures of them smattered on 14 year old boys’ walls. And I don’t think there will be any male bedroom fantasies about LiLo and saMANtha either.

I love how LiLo packs more drama into a week than a year of bad reality tv. And I love how Wilmer Valderama turned out to be the high point of her dating career.

I still support the skinny

I'm currently in the disappointing, anti-climatic aftermath that always happens after a cycle of America's Next Top Model finishes. The girl I want to win never wins. This season was especially disappointing because I was SURE the girl I wanted to win (Anya) was actually going to win. Like 100% sure, no doubt in my mind... Well, no doubt until the editing of the final episode clearly implied that the plus-sized, snooty and posey biatch Whitney was going to win - What? Oh my God, like, I know! She of the "my face is, like, my best feature!" comment. Ugh. Doe-eyed Anya was so much more endearing and deserving. Deserving doesn't always win, but endearing often does.

The upside of course is that a plus-sized model finally won - it is Cycle 10 afterall, and about time Tyra represented what is now her own (I mean plus-sized, not crazy ladies). And Whitney's all like "You know I've got cuuuurves, and I'm a real girl!". Well, in this picture, she ain't as curvy, but she's still doing that "mmm hmm" valley girl face that we've seen so much of.

Phfff. So, turns out, Whitney used to be a skinny bitch. She fell off the celery and rice-cakes wagon and decided to accept the label plus-sized cause she couldn't make it as a skeletor. I'm all for real body types, but models are uspposed to be mannequins that represent an ideal. Representation of body types in movies and on tv? I'm all for it. Representation of all body types on the runway? Forget it. Give me a non-fat sugar-free latte and show me the young, skinny, pretty little things.

If they're gonna try to redefine the modelling industry - which is not going to happen - why not include some short girls next season too? Heck, let's put in some ugly chicks as well. And some more skin diseases, like Cycle 4 Michelle. Why do models have to be tall, pretty and free of flesh-eating disease? That's just not fair. Let's see real girls!

Oh, and next season on American Idol, let's some hear some mroe "real" voices. Why should only the talented singers get to be contestants? Oh, because it's a SINGING competition, for good SINGERS. Kind of like how America's Next Top Model is a MODELING competition, for tall, skinny and pretty MODELS.

Just checking.